i feel trapped in an emotional loop where i’m just cyclically experiencing the same emotions over and over
as though each week has the same ups and downs and beats and absences
each kind of happy is the same and each kind of unhappy is just like the last
it could be lack of distraction or it could be the boundary of the mesh of human experience
perhaps that is all time is; a week is simply a recycled set of events that recur finitely to a definite yet unpredictable end
no matter what occurs within the confines of any construct of time, every recurrence of said construct is identical
a second is always a second; a minute a minute; an hour an hour; a day a day; a week a week; a month a month; a year a year; a century a century; a millennium merely another millenium
one’s microscopic presence within each arbitrary unit will never divert the course of time
it will be there before this day and after this day stretching on and on and on without stopping
How Could ANYONE Boycott Water?!?!
Everyone’s making such a big deal about this Oreo gay marriage campaign, but no one even looked over at water’s page!
Last night Water posted this picture on their Facebook feed:
And here are some of the comments:
I made this with Jake Weisman.
Dear Daenerys
Dear Daenerys,
I recently walked in on my boyfriend of three years naked with another woman. I was hurt, of course, but deep down I still love him, and I know that he still loves me. He swears it was a mistake and that it won’t happen again. Should I trust him?
Sincerely,
Feeling Betrayed
Dear Feeling Betrayed,
WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS?
Daenerys xo
Dear Daenerys,
My wife and I have been married for a year now. We’re both 24, just starting our careers, and not really in the financial position - but she wants to go off birth control and try and have a baby. I’ve tried to reason with her that it’s not the right thing to do at this moment in time, but she won’t listen. What should I do?
Sincerely,
Not Ready
Dear Not Ready,
Well for a start, you have no obligation to have sex with her at all. If she chooses to go off birth control, that’s a choice you have to respect. She may, for all you know, also have legitimate health reasons for doing so. Sit down with her and have a civilised discussion about it. When the Khal wanted to impregnate me, he basically just stuck it in me without asking. Eventually I was fine with it until I sacrificed the life of my unborn for his temporary half-life in a witch’s horrid ritual, but she may wish to have the courtesy of a choice in the matter. It’s all about communication in these matters. Speaking of which, WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS?
Dear Daenerys,
WHERE ARE YOUR DRAGONS?
Sincerely,
Daeblairis Terpblavian
Dear Daeblairis Terpblavian,
Fantastic question. I do not know. I would like my children back. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS.
Sincerely,
Daenerys
Dear Daenerys
Dear Daenerys,
I recently walked in on my boyfriend of three years naked with another woman. I was hurt, of course, but deep down I still love him, and I know that he still loves me. He swears it was a mistake and that it won’t happen again. Should I trust him?
Sincerely,
Feeling Betrayed
Dear Feeling Betrayed,
WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS?
Daenerys xo
Dear Daenerys,
My wife and I have been married for a year now. We’re both 24, just starting our careers, and not really in the financial position - but she wants to go off birth control and try and have a baby. I’ve tried to reason with her that it’s not the right thing to do at this moment in time, but she won’t listen. What should I do?
Sincerely,
Not Ready
Dear Not Ready,
Well for a start, you have no obligation to have sex with her at all. If she chooses to go off birth control, that’s a choice you have to respect. She may, for all you know, also have legitimate health reasons for doing so. Sit down with her and have a civilised discussion about it. When the Khal wanted to impregnate me, he basically just stuck it in me without asking. Eventually I was fine with it until I sacrificed the life of my unborn for his temporary half-life in a witch’s horrid ritual, but she may wish to have the courtesy of a choice in the matter. It’s all about communication in these matters. Speaking of which, WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS?
Dear Daenerys,
WHERE ARE YOUR DRAGONS?
Sincerely,
Daeblairis Terpblavian
Dear Daeblairis Terpblavian,
Fantastic question. I do not know. I would like my children back. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS. WHERE ARE MY DRAGONS? I AM THE MOTHER OF DRAGONS.
Sincerely,
Daenerys
Reasons Why People Should Not Be Allowed To Breed
Whether or not someone should have kids depends on whether that person:
- likes Two and a Half Men on Facebook
- has feather extensions
- thinks Keira Knightley was a better Elizabeth Bennet than Jennifer Ehle
- has NOT had a sex dream about Colin Firth as Mr Darcy
- has bad teeth
- has thin lips
- has feather extensions
- popped collar
- is a zombie
- has never seen The Lion King
- is a man who deems it his responsibility to dictate the needs of women to actual women
- didn’t getInception the first time
- thinks Pablo Honey is the best Radiohead album
- is sexually attracted to trees
- has feather extensions
- has sex with children but never calls
- can’t recite a full scene from a classic Simpsons episode off by heart
- enjoys watching golf
- enjoys watching golf and masturbating
- enjoys watching golf and masturbating to the commentators’ voices
- non-ironically uses acronyms in verbal conversation
- refuses to fart in front of people i mean seriously
- has ever tasted a baby’s tears to see if they grant eternal life
- claims to hate something with no first-hand experience of it
- has feather extensions
- is a misogynist
- is a homophobe
- is a racist
- is a gay black lady
Reasons Why People Should Not Be Allowed To Breed
Whether or not someone should have kids depends on whether that person:
- likes Two and a Half Men on Facebook
- has feather extensions
- thinks Keira Knightley was a better Elizabeth Bennet than Jennifer Ehle
- has NOT had a sex dream about Colin Firth as Mr Darcy
- has bad teeth
- has thin lips
- has feather extensions
- popped collar
- is a zombie
- has never seen The Lion King
- is a man who deems it his responsibility to dictate the needs of women to actual women
- didn’t getInception the first time
- thinks Pablo Honey is the best Radiohead album
- is sexually attracted to trees
- has feather extensions
- has sex with children but never calls
- can’t recite a full scene from a classic Simpsons episode off by heart
- enjoys watching golf
- enjoys watching golf and masturbating
- enjoys watching golf and masturbating to the commentators’ voices
- non-ironically uses acronyms in verbal conversation
- refuses to fart in front of people i mean seriously
- has ever tasted a baby’s tears to see if they grant eternal life
- claims to hate something with no first-hand experience of it
- has feather extensions
- is a misogynist
- is a homophobe
- is a racist
- is a gay black lady
so
i agreed to do scriptfrenzy this month, which is where you’re supposed to write 100 pages of script before the end of the month. thanks to week full of assignments and being really tired all the time, it’s about a week in and instead of the 23 pages i’d need done to be on track to finishing, i have a grand total of…1. this does not bode well you guys
Ransom
In my mind, I’m still trapped there. Held hostage by a beautiful memory. Call it Stockholm syndrome, if you will, it’s still everything I want.
You’re the bank I want to be crouching behind a desk in.
You’re the gunman in front of the convenience store counter while I mash the button labelled ‘Emergency’, unaware it’s connected to nothing.
You’re the gun on the nape of my neck.
You’re the black-windowed van I’m tied up in the back of.
They’ll never free me because the ransom is just too high. Your demands are insane - who would grant them? At this point - after all this time! - the only thing that will separate us, to bring an end to the aching hours, is a sudden mistake; an instant tragedy.
